IF YOU'RE OFFENDED BY CURSE WORDS DON'T READ THIS ENTRY

I'm fucking pissed at every single thing today. Let me list them:
1. I'm pissed at my disease
2. I'm pissed at trying to figure out whether or not the Governor of NJ will make it necessary for me to take Medical retirement
3. I"m pissed at my job. I"ve been reassigned for the last time I can take.
4. I'm pissed at my job because most of it sucks.
5. I'm pissed at my job because I have to confront discipline and correction with my peers which seems unusual and it's somthing I'm unfamiliar with. But, I have a boss who is great and has advised me of what is required, but now, I have to make other people know what's required and they should already know this.
6. I"m pissed at people who are loud mouths who don't know what the FUCK they are talking about.
7. I have the new Governor... after all these years of dedicated service to help the "silent" elderly and thier families, who are underserved and not heard by him or anyone else who wants a VOTE.
8. I"m pissed because I have an incurable disease and want to keep working, but may not be able to.
9 I'm pissed because the 3 best friends, who advised me the most at Gilda's club support group are DEAD.
10. I"m pissed because I'm terrified.
11. I"m pissed because of the effect this disease has had on my family and friends.
12. I'm pissed because I haven't had less than a 2.5 hour commute home from work in the last 4 days coming home from Trenton which totally SUCKS the big one and makes me a crazy person before I even get to the solitude of my home.
13. I'm pissed because my son is depressed.
14. I'm pissed because people suck a lot and hurt my family and take no responsibility and no action to improve thier behavior which results in pain to my family.
14. I'm pissed because my husband is unsatisfied with his job and is depressed about it and they just probably suck as much as our DHSS which has sucked every ounce out of my in the last 3 years..
15. I"m pissed because I have friends who are also effected by this fucking disease known as CANCER.
16. I"m pissed because I have stress.
17. I"m pissed because I have insomnia and this disease is the worst thing that can happen to a person with insomnia and I want to be asleep NOW>
18. I"m pissed because I really don't enjoy my current job although I love most of the people I work with.
19. I'm pissed because of the reaction my husband has to my disease, he must maintain strength, even when he doesn't feel strong and this SUCKS, FUCKING SUCKS, since we used to support each other during hard times and now, between my illness and my job, I'm drained to the bone and can hardly help my pet cat.
20. I'm pissed because of the effect this disease has had on my sons' emotional growth and their satisfaction with life.
21. I'm pissed because of my sister's detachment from reality for such a long time after my mother's death, which has delayed my ability to move passed her death and move on.
22. I"m pissed because my mother died a month before I was diagnosed and I never got to grieve her properly.
23. I"m pissed because there is no treatment solutions for many cancers including mine, the deadly OVARIAN CANCER.
24. I'm pissed because 2009 is coming to and end and there's no additional treatment of even ideas on how to treat my cancer. It leaves me statistically left with 2 year and 4 months to beat the odds.
25. I'm pissed that my life is passing before my eyes...grateful that the realities of life are still there,,,, but the hard times are harder... no time to waste, got to get them straightned out before I"m gone.
26. I'm missing a lot of the reasons that I'm pissed here, I'm quite sure of that... but to be honest, generally.... I'M JUST PISSED OFF AT THE WHOLE FUCKING THING WITH REGARD TO THIS FUCKING CANCER SHIT.
Good evening and I hope the world sleeps better than I do.
Peace from pissed of jeanne