again with the sleeplessness

So OK, here I am again. Stress is not the word to use that describes how I feel lately.
So, I have clenched teeth which has caused me severe jaw pain, my shoulders seem permanently held upward towards my neck. My shoulders and neck are stiff as a board.
I'm mentally stressed. All these things have resulted in my ABSOLUTELY HORRIBLE INSOMNIA.
I really have no more solutions to try... tomorrow I need to arise at 5:30 or 5:45 and drive 63 miles to my office and sit and be stressed to the absolute limit for 8 hours, only to repeat the 63 mile drive home to my place of bliss, the family home.
I must admit. I feel like this is my fault... the sane and educated me says this is bullshit.. this is not my fault.. It's a shame I've been pre-programed by my genes to be high strung (to be honest, I really don't know what this means, but I think it's me) and this really sux. I try so hard to get relaxed and it just doesn't happen naturally for me. I can't remember when I slept easily. Since High School, I've been plagued by this insomnia, my disease, the ever present ovarian cancer that will kill me, makes it harder and harder to relax and sleep.
It's very hard trying to keep up a good face when you know you have something that will kill you eventually. 5 years is what the research shows for a recurrent ovarian cancer patient. Although I try to stat positive since there are outliers to everything, it's hard when you don't see any particular improvement in your disease process. How do you justify, somethings are better and somethings are worse, as "stable"? But that's what they call it for "chronic" cancer patients. Very few people know my reality. I try not to utter the words 5 year prognosis to anyone. But now and then it slips out. It slips out daily in my mind. This may be having an impact on that constant inability to relax, sore muscles from the arm pits up, headaches, jaw clenching and jaw pain... gee do you think?
I'm gonna give it another try at sleep.... cannabis seems to have helped me feel in the mood to sleep, but jaw is still clenching... we shall see.
Peace.